


The First Time

by Callofthemoon



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: A complete lack of detail, Canon Compliant, Cute, Fluff, for as much as I remember canon, its a list, probably about as much as the actual writers remembered, why do we always have them move to new york
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2020-05-15 23:34:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19306126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Callofthemoon/pseuds/Callofthemoon
Summary: The first time he saw him, Derek ignored him.The first time he trusted him, he realized that it had been a long time coming.The first time Derek said I love you, Stiles simply said it back, as if they had done it a million times.--ie. Derek's reflections on his relationship with Stiles through a series of first times, that remarkably does not actually include any sexy times. I'm serious guys, we are talking a remarkable lack of any details.





	The First Time

The first time he saw him, Derek ignored him. Another solemn face in a sea of people with none of the right words to say. The world had ended in fire and nothing but Laura was keeping him from collapsing on the floor with ash in his nose and Kate on his tongue, lost in the lack of pack bonds that had strummed since the day he was born. He stared at the walls, too shocked to be angry, unable to focus on anything but the emptiness inside. His reverie was broken when a small hand reached out and grabbed him. He turned to find the little boy, a proud BHPD logo screaming to be seen across his chest, holding out Reese Cups. He stared until the boy took it upon himself to place them in Derek’s lap. And then the boy was scurrying away, the only person not to say “I’m sorry” the whole day.

The first time he left Beacon Hills he meant for it to be forever, and when Laura said she would be back in three days, too tired to force him to come, he had smiled, gratefully, and told her he would be right there waiting for her. And she had laughed and walked out the door. And if Derek had known he would have followed her, and if had known he would have never let her go. And when he felt the pack bond break he screamed because now he had to return, he had to find her and he had to do it alone. And when it took him only an hour to pack up the things of importance, he wondered why he had ever thought to stay behind.

The first time he heard him speak, he was telling his friend about lycanthropy, and all he could hear was Laura. Laura's laugh and Laura's wit and he wondered how bright and how stupid this kid had to be to get to werewolves before his friend. The friend that had actually been bitten and should have already realized that something was going on. And then he realized that if this kid was a wolf, then someone had to do something, someone had to keep them safe. And while he knew that they were kids, and that this was a terrible first impression, all he could think about was Laura and if he could only keep these stupid kids out of the woods until he found the threat, maybe he could keep them alive long enough to change that impression.

The first time he spoke to him, Stiles was terrified, as if Derek could stand having anymore blood on his hands. But even as Stiles shrunk back, he was reaching forward and helping. Running towards the thing that had sent his heart beating at a pace that Derek had never heard before. And Derek knew that this boy was different, but didn't understand why.

The first time Stiles lied for him, to his father, the Sheriff, Derek wondered what he had done to deserve that. To deserve the way Stiles clung to the door long after his father had left, with sadness and guilt tingling his scent in a way that made Derek wonder exactly what he had missed. But he needed a place to stay and Stiles was the only person he thought wouldn't do something to him in his sleep.

The first time he hurt him, he didn't realize until hours later that for all that Stiles complained and for all that he spoke, he wasn't saying anything. And he didn't know what to do when the bruise that formed was ignored, another lie to the thousands that Stiles had already told his father, and Derek wondered why it felt like he had hurt himself.

The first time he was scared of him was when he held a Molotov cocktail in his hand, with such determination in his eyes that he never doubted that he could follow through. And even when the alpha was his uncle and even when it all came down to Laura, he felt afraid only of this boy who was ready to kill to protect his friends. A boy who when it was all over stood up on shaky legs and cracked a joke, as if he helped kill people every day. And Derek was afraid of how his world had changed Stiles, had sharpened him into a weapon that could kill.

The first time he respected him was when he came back for him in the pool. When he felt hands grabbing his shirt and pulling him back to the surface. He had made his peace with death the second he felt the Kanima get him, but this boy wasn't letting him go. And when minutes turned to hours and he felt Stiles going under more and more he tried to hurt him, tried to get the boy to save himself but Stiles simply kept going. Waiting for something, waiting for anyone to change the situation. And when they got onto dry land and when they clung to steady ground. Stiles simply thanked Scott. And Derek didn't know if he could have done that, if Scott treated him like that, and he respected this boy for all that he could do that Derek couldn't.

The first time he trusted him, he realized that it had been a long time coming. This moment where tears and desperation made Derek's whole body ache, because he should have known. He had fallen for this trap already, he had bedded the wrong girl before. And while Jennifer was surprised that she hadn't completely won over Derek, she should have known that he would always follow Stiles.

The first time he left him, he didn't say goodbye. Cora had simply packed their bags and they had gone. But even as they walked out of the loft, Derek knew that he would return. They needed him here in ways that Cora never would. And weeks later when they were laying on the beach, Cora simply told him that she understood, and they promised to Skype and both knew they wouldn't, and he returned to Beacon Hills in chaos.

The first time he saw the Nogitsune he wondered how anyone could ever have thought that it was Stiles. The eyes were too hard and the smirk too mean to be the person they all knew so well. And when it came down to it all, he knew that he could never hurt it, never stand by while Chris Argent shot him, because it was still Stiles’ face, and he would never hurt him again.

The first time he saw Stiles hesitate was when he told him to go, because he knew that he was dying. But Stiles could still save Scott, still save the only person that had been through it all with him, and so he told him to go. When all he wanted was to scream, Stay with me. Let me die with the only one who understands. But he didn't say it. He told him to go, and Stiles moved and then hesitated. And Derek knew that once again he understood.

The first time he said goodbye, he meant it. And he didn't understand how he could walk away when all Stiles had said was “okay.” Because he could see it in his eyes, how done he was, and Derek knew that he wasn't going to survive in this town much longer, and he needed to get out. And Stiles simply nodded and told him that he understood. And Derek wondered if he could ever find someone like this again.

The first time Stiles walked into the class, Derek almost didn't recognize him. He watched the man enter the room and only was sure it was Stiles when that familiar scent of cinnamon, adderall and guilt reached him. And he when the professor introduced him as the TA, he saw the shock on Stiles’ face, and then he could smell nothing but fear and guilt and anxiety anxiety anxiety until Stiles stood and fled the class. Derek didn't know what to do when he didn't show up again, and Derek couldn't find him on the roster.

The first time he saw him in the coffee shop he had already sat down before he understood what was happening. Stiles flinched, but he was already sitting in the corner, and it was only when he wouldn't catch Derek's eye, that Derek stood up, leaving the cup of Stiles favorite coffee behind. He was opening the door when he heard the whisper, as if Stiles was afraid to let the sound out, he simply said “stay” and Derek walked back to that little table and sat back down, clutching his tea as if it was his last hope. Certainly it was too early to tell Stiles he wasn't going anywhere, ever again.

The first time they had a conversation in New York was over lunch, and halfway through, Stiles simply stopped talking, mid sentence and apologized for rambling. Nothing could have broken Derek's heart more, because Stiles should never have to stop talking, he should still have that energy that seemed to have been stolen from him. But he simply shrugged and reassured him that he had been enjoying the discussion about the finer details of bluegrass music, and by the smallest twitch of Stiles lips, he was almost believed.

The first time Derek went over to Stiles apartment, he asked how he had gotten the single room, and Stiles simply shrugged and muttered how night terrors made for bad roommates. But as the semester dragged on and the other bed stayed empty, Derek brought sheets over, had even found Star Wars ones just to make Stiles smile. Because he was slowly realizing he would do anything to get to see that smile.

The first time he stayed over Stiles woke up screaming, and Derek wished once again that emotional pain was as easy to drain as physical pain. But the next day Stiles thanked him and said it was the best nights sleep he had gotten in weeks. Derek resolved to stay over every night if it helped, and slowly he moved in, one shirt at a time.

The first time he heard him laugh in New York was after Derek told a stupid joke as they waited for their food at a nearby diner. Derek hadn't even thought it was funny, but there was Stiles laughing. Head thrown back and all, and Derek couldn't help but feeling smug that Stiles smile remained for the rest of the night.

The first time he brought up living together Stiles walked out. But the next time they met for their biweekly coffee meet up, Stiles had brought a list of potential places, all within walking distance of the campus. And Derek knew that was the apology he was going to get. And when they settled on a small apartment with a large kitchen, he knew it was the right decision when Stiles ran his hands over the counters and smiled at him. And when they were baking cookies on their first night together, he still maintains it was Stiles that started the flour fight, but fully admits that he ate the majority of the raw dough.

The first time he asked him out, Stiles looked confused. It took Derek another few minutes before realizing that they already were dating. And he apologized with a movie marathon of all of Stiles favorites. Halfway through Stiles interlocked their hands, and Derek was never going to let him go.

The first time they kissed it took them both hours to realize what had happened. Derek had been running late for class, and Stiles had handed him breakfast as he hopped around to put on his shoes. Grabbing his coat off the wall, he pecked Stiles on the lips and promised to be back in time for dinner. It was only when Derek was halfway through leading a review session that he realized what had happened. He may or may not have freaked out for the rest of the day, but when he met the delivery guy at the door and walked in holding Thai food, Stiles simply beamed at him. The next morning it was Stiles who kissed him, and Derek wondered why he had been nervous in the first place.

The first time he saw Stiles in action since he had left, he wondered if he could have changed anything if he had stayed. The ruthless boy before him spoke of hurt far deeper than Derek knew. And when the vampire lay still at his feet, he watched as Stiles broke down again. But this time Derek was there, and he held him close, and carried his lover home. When Stiles finally came to he immediately looked at Derek. “I had to, you understand you have to believe me…” And Derek kissed each one of Stiles fingertips, getting him to stop staring at his hands as if they had betrayed him. And he stared directly into Stiles eyes as he reassured him that he would always believe him, and that he was so proud of the man he had become. And the relief that filled the room felt like some of those old wounds were starting to heal.

The first time Derek said I love you, Stiles simply said it back, as if they had done it a million times. And he guess they both already knew that this was it, they had loved each other for too long already.

The first time they fought it was over something stupid. They were bickering over the radio channel when the argument got sharper. The words became meaner and soon they were screaming so loudly that Derek knew he had to pull over. And then like every fight, that weird lull of silence sent them both crying, and they clung to each other even tighter than normal. Not letting go, even after they fell asleep. In the morning they decided that they were only going to need one of the bedrooms anymore, they had just been too nervous to take that step forward.

The first time they spoke to Scott again, he was asking for a favor. He showed up on their doorstep, and simply said he got the address from the Sheriff. It was the only reason Derek let him in the door, because the Sheriff wouldn't have caved easily, which meant that this was important. Scott didn't seem to notice the tense atmosphere and proceeded to explain that a pack in Arizona had fallen to the Calaveras, leaving behind a little boy. And it took Derek longer than Stiles to understand exactly why a werewolf child wouldn't be a good candidate for foster care.

The first time he saw the little boy, he knew they were going to take him home. The six-year-old was sitting on the steps of a ruined home, and Derek simply looked at Stiles, who had the same expression. This boy was theirs now, and they might not be perfect but they would stand with each other through it all. And when the boy met their eyes with tear stained cheeks, Stiles simply picked him up and began to babble until the boy began to laugh, and Derek knew that they were going to be alright.

The first time they took their son, and Derek knew he would never tire of that, out ice skating, Derek realized that eventually he would have to let go of that boys hand. But when the boy fell, Derek decided that this time he could hold on.

The first time Derek came home to Stiles sleeping with their son curled up next to him, he realized that he had a family now, that they were a unit that could never be broken. 

The first time Stiles brought up moving to the suburbs because of the dog, Derek had agreed before he remembered that they didn't have a dog.

The first time Derek realized he was out of first times, he simply hugged his family close. He had finally found something to last.


End file.
